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Smart List: 60 People Shaping the Future of K-12 Education
Open Source Education ACT based on Accountability, Collaboration, and Transparency
No Teachers Are Qualified in Low-Income Districts So The Children Get Left Behind Act
The “Flush Education Down the Toilet Act”
or “Some Children Really Should Be Left Behind Act”
The No More Dubyas Act
Darn you, Julie Dalley!! You beat me to it!!
I’ve been calling it “No child gets ahead” since Christ was a Corporal.
Something new… How about the YACUD Act? “Yet Another Congressional Utopian Dream”. (and interchangeable with “Yet Another Congressional Utopian Disaster”, depending on which side of the fence you sit on!)
“No Culture Left Blooming” Act. This both recognizes NCLB’s impact on the arts and saves money in an economic downturn by keeping the existing acronym.
Be Kinder to the Behinder
the No Teacher Left Standing act
A colleague of mine suggested a long time ago the “No Child’s Behind Left Untested” act.
NCLB should incorporate two new phases..
1. AXED?…. Any eXtra crEDit?
2. COP..MAP..GAA! Cut Out Pictures. Make A Poster. Get An A!
Has anyone thought, in the midst of all this clamor, that maybe Jonathan Swift was right?
The name does not need to be changed, only to refocus on the original purpose of the act. This is another Civil Rights type problem, only now the purpose is equality of funding for all schools to teach our children.
Original act was:
“The law dates to 1965, when Congress passed it to channel federal money to poor children in the war on poverty, calling it the Elementary and Secondary Education Act.” (NYTimes)
Names like:
Curb Children Imagination and Curiosity Act
Government Always Stifling Teachers Act
(or)
“No Child Left Behind”
accomplish NOTHING! Lise Quinn in the above post has very good ideas.
Let the teachers teach, but give all schools equal means to do it!
How about “HOW TO Ruin Public Education in America Act”
You Can Test ‘Em All You Want To, But You Can’t Make ‘Em Think Act
I’ve been personally calling it “Mo Childs Left Behind”. I enjoy dialects and I thought changing two letters to make the meaning opposite of the original namer’s intent was kind of witty. I’ve been told it is racist. I don’t know why, it’s just playing with sounds. In fact, children of all races and needs are left behind. It’s an equal lack-of-opportunity act. Maybe the “don’t think about education that makes sense and make a ton of money on testing” act? Oh wait, that’s too many letters…
“No child left behind; no child moving forward” – is a good idea. It summarizes the best intention of education act. They really don’t want children lagging in education, but there is no intetion to allow smart children to realize their potential.
By concentrating on the slow children, the top students are being unchallenged — if they can pass the base “competence” level, they’re ignored. Kind of dumb, if you ask me — the people who make this country great are the smart ones who thrive on challenges. But due to this law, they’re not getting what they need. That’s how you train slackers.
So I call it the “NCAA” act — No Child Allowed Ahead.
No Child Steps Out of Line. Originally called “No Child Moves Ahead” in our community, because the act appeals to the lowest common denominator and holds the stronger students back while waiting for others to catch up.
No Child Allowed Ahead
Has the exact same meaning as the real name.
HOW ABOUT “THE PUBLIC EDUCATION ‘HAIL MARY PASS’ ACT?” With the birthrate increasing exponentially and zero hope of reversing that any time this century; under-educated out-of-work parents swamped by the stress of their own financial problems and busy watching “American Idol;” tax revenues down everywhere; school systems everywhere out of money; gangs and drugs infiltrating classrooms everywhere; the religious freaks trying to ban science and re-write the curriculuum, it will take divine intervention to save public education in America. Q: Is there even a celestial superhero willing to listen? And if there is, can she respond in time for today’s kindergartener to graduate in 12 years knowing how to read?
No Child Behind Left
This is a serious entry. One of the choices for what became NCLB was:
One Child at a Time
This gets to the heart of the biggest problem of NCLB: AYP is pegged to a grade level, so that year to year comparisons are between completely different kids. This is crazy.
Kids should be tracked individually, and results applied to the school atteneded and teachers they have. I’ve read some reports from the stimulus bill that individual tracking is getting started. But will it be applied to AYP and thus sanctions? I hope so.
Side by Side Act………………
Bring them Along Act………..
SEFAA – Self Esteem For All Act
How about, “No Child Left Ahead?”
Because that’s exactly what it is doing. By dumbing down the classroom material to reach the lower level students we are then by doing a disservice to those students who thrive in the classroom. To think that all students will all be able to reach a certain level, by a set specific time in their development is a utopianism, and will not amount to much other than highly qualified teachers loosing their jobs due to insufficient standardized test grades. Boo to this act! I believe we should go back to how it was, you learned because you wanted to not because it was forced.
But whatever, I’m, “old school”. . . And I’m only 23
Every Child Deserves an A Act
(A winner with our child worshiping patents)
School Children Having Only Outstanding Learning Experiences Act (SCHOOL Experiences Act)
“Leave no child with a fat behind.”
Not the most clever, but puts the two most popular buzz-words together
Raising the Bar and Holding Educators Accountable Act
RBHEAA
or, in honor of Sarah Palin
The Test Baby Test! Act
How about:
The Kurt Vonnegut Between Time and Timbuktu Act (I’m thinking of the
ballet sequence here…)
The Let’s All Strive for Mediocrity Act
The Let’s Ignore Those with Special Needs Act
The Swell the Enrollment at Private Schools Act
The George W. Bush’s Only Enduring Legacy and It Sucks Act
EIEO: Education Is Equal Opportunity Act
AKAD: Access to Knowledge Access to Democracy Act
AMS: Abolish Mental Slavery Act
The “Do-Over” act.
Every Child Deserves a Chance
The No Public School Left Law
The “No Child Left Behind Unless They’re In A Poor School District” Act
RATFinK – The Remove All That’s Fun in Knowledge Act
In the wake of W., what else can you rename “No Child Left Behind” but…
“No Adult Left Ahead”
No High Achieving Student Given Enough Resources To Lead The Way
No School Board Left Alone
No Union Contract Steroid-ed Up With Health Benefits That Began Disappearing From The Rest Of The World 15 Years Ago And Are Basically Gone Now Left Unmodified
No Negligent Parent Left Unshamed
the Teaching Initiative To Advance National Investment in Children (TITANIC)
I’ve always thought a more appropriate name would be:
“No Child Gets Ahead.”
“The NEA Has to Learn to Read First Act” because it imposes accountability on teachers, which is anathema to the union.
The “Band-Aid act” or the “Blame the Teacher’s” act
Suggested by a friend who designs tests for a living…
No Psychometrician Left Behind
The Dog Ate My Homeworl Act
Sorry… The Dog Ate My Homework Act…..
In a tribute to W lets call it “No Child Has a Chance”.
America Learning Act
The “They Were Here a Minute Ago” Act
The Schools are for Testing, Not for Learning Act
The Let’s Catch Up With the Rest of the World By Throwing Out Creativity, the One Thing We Were Good At Act
The Hold Administrators Accountable by Allowing them to Blame Someone Else Act
The Criticize, Don’t Fix Act
Dumbing of America (DOA)
(tried for DUH acronym,but…)