Caption This Photo, Win Lunch!

The very talented Justin Cohen runs the Office of Portfolio Management for the District of Columbia Public Schools under D.C. Chancellor Michelle Rhee…in other words, he’s a big gun on the D.C. school scene.  

Where the hell is Tubbs?

The other day, while on an otherwise uneventful boat trip, Cohen’s vessel was boarded by the U.S Coast Guard for a routine safety search, most  likely because in that outfit and shades, Cohen gives off the vibe of an international fugitive or trafficker rather than a school official.   Anyway, caption this photo and the best caption gets a free lunch.

48 Replies to “Caption This Photo, Win Lunch!”

  1. Dear Mom,

    Just sent Jimmy to swim with the fishes. It’s a beautiful day out, wish you were here.


  2. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime. Shoot the fish with an automatic rifle while blogging about it, and you’re using multiple learning modalities while integrating technology.

  3. D.C. Schools officials prepare to pepper 825 N. Capitol St with long-range automatic weapons fire from Chancellor Michelle Rhee’s new attack Zodiac. The craft was purchased with savings garnered from lay-offs of dead-wood bureaucrats.

  4. They told me and Tubbs we were restricted to textbook distribution duty. They didn’t tell us how we had do it!

  5. It’s a two-pronged approach: for positive reinforcement, we’re instating a merit bonus system. To discourage chronic poor performance…

  6. 1) Taking the big guns to this week’s DCPS performance pay negotiations

    2) DCPS: Under the gun. A really big gun.

    3) With the lift of the gun ban, DCPS can finally get down to business

  7. Dear Mr. Rotherham:

    It has come to our attention that you are in possession of some photos or a recent military maneuver that I cannot discuss. Suffice it to say, I need you to do your patriotic duty and take that picture off the Internets before it emboldens our enemies.

    Needless to say, Dick Cheney and Margaret Spellings know nothing about this in spite of the fact that you can see both of them reflected in Mr. Cohen’s sunglasses.

    Thank you for your cooperation and assistance in this matter.


    President George W. Bush
    The Decider

  8. Caption options:

    1) Say hello to my little friend, competition in public education

    2) The carrot or the stick: You decide

    3) As a DC public official, my message to SCOTUS, ” if we can beat them, join them!”

    4) Great schools: By any means necessary

  9. Used car salesman caught posing as student in D.C. Schools’ inaugural semester-at-sea program. Repeated references to a “Good-as-new 2DR ’92 Lebaron $1200 o.b.o.” in essays tips off program administrators.

  10. Secretary Colbert said to bomb low-performing schools, but under our differentiated intervention pilot program we strafe them the first time they mess up, and save the bombing part for later.

  11. A native of South Jersey, Cohen is determined that this not happen to a DC public school. Not on his watch.

  12. Randi, did you just ask me if I had my tickets to the show? And then you were going to roll up your sleeves and show me your “big guns.” Yea, that’s funny.

  13. Being the “Big Gun” of DC Public Schools- $140,000

    Sports Jacket from Kohls-$85

    Really cool glasses from the Sunglass Hut-$40

    Being Board by the coast guard, photographed and being called a drug trafficker or fugitive while being plastered all over the internet-PRICELESS!

  14. Growing increasingly tired of all the trash talk coming from those rappers rapping bout how hard they hold down their hoods, Justin decided to show the world that Yatchees can be gangster, too.

  15. Ensuring “Safe Harbors” for DCPS
    (NCLB School Choice Provision, for those of you who are not regular Eduwonks!)

  16. These extra features on the “Munich” DVD are really lame. This collector’s edition is a rip-off.

  17. 1.) School accountability contingency plan #43b. Justin case.

    2.) Think this staff retreat is intense? You should see Chancellor Rhee’s team in action at 825.

    3.) Revolutionizing DCPS. Justin time.

  18. What evidence has poster or Justin Cohen given that he is very talented?

    Mr.Cohen has appeared often and lamely, to explain his DCPS employment. So far Justin Cohen and “Portfolio Management” so far, are to education what Pons and Fleischmann were to unlimited energy. (See “Bad Science: The Short Life and Weird Times of Cold Fusion” by Gary Taubes.) Pons and Fleischmann were well trained scientists; Fleischmann had had a brilliant career. Justin Cohen?

  19. Always loved a Jewish boy with a BIG GUN! (I only feel a little creepy writing that & no I’m not his mother)

  20. Come on. Any kid in this country that gets a K-12 education, does it on their own. Name the law for what we actually do in school, “Test America.”

  21. Justin Cohen, Director of the Office of Portfolio Management for D.C. Public Schools by day, fearless crime fighter by night. Do not fear citizens of D.C., JC is protecting your children and your streets!

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